Monday quotes

Don't let anyone steal your Dreams. Follow your heart, no matter what.
- Jack Cainfield

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
- Joseph Campbell

Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it.
- Jack Canfield

You really have to look inside and find your inner strength, and say, "I'm proud of what I am and who I am, and I'm just going to be myself."
- Mariah Carey

How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these.
- George Washington Carver

The capacity to care is the thing which gives life its deepest meaning and significance.
- Pablo Casals

Every winner has scars.
- Herbert N. Casson

There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm.
- Willa Cather

Star The most wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed.
- Nicolas Chamfort

If you're still hanging onto a dead dream of yesterday, laying flowers on its grave by the hour, you cannot be planting the seeds for a new dream to grow today.
- Joyce Chapman

Real generosity is doing something nice for someone who'll never find out.
- Frank A. Clark

We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another.
- Luciano de Crescenzo

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.
- Marie Curie

serenity

serenity;

the state or quality of being serene, calm or tranquil.

This was the topic at last nights house meeting.
we are all familiar with the serenity prayer,
yet everyone has their own view of what
the feeling actually consists of.

In essence it is the exact opposite of the chaos,
insecurity and agitation of our former days.

What comes to mind for me is the Eagles song,
"peaceful easy feeling";

I like the way your sparkling earrings lay,
against your skin, it's so brown
and I wanna sleep with you
in the desert tonight
with a billion stars all around
'cause I gotta peaceful easy feeling
and I know you won't let me down
'cause I'm already standing on the
ground
And I found out a long time ago
what a woman can do to your soul
Ah, but she can't take you anyway
You don't already know how to go
and I gotta peaceful, easy feeling
and I know you won't let me down
'cause I'm already standing on the ground
I get this feeling I may know you
as a lover and a friend
but this voice keeps whispering
in my other ear, tells me
I may never see you again
'cause I get a peaceful, easy feeling
and I know you won't let me down
'cause I'm already standing on the ground
'cause I'm already standing...
on the ground

asking for help

Not always the easiest task for many of us.

I know for this alcoholic coming in holding
on to ego, false pride, arrogance and a
"know it all" attitude, it was nearly impossible.

After all, I was a functioning alcoholic, or so I thought.
I had been holding onto the illusion of control.

As time went on it gradually became easier
to ask for help and guidance.
My way and only gotten me back to old
habits and eventually failure.

Today I seek knowledge from those who are
willing to share their experience.
In recent years I have become a student
of addiction and recovery.

Not only is it about knowledge, but how to
apply what I learn to my daily life.

upcoming holidays

Soon a common topic in the rooms will
be the upcoming terror trilogy of holidays

Thanksgiving is commonly the easiest
to handle for most alcoholics
Not known for raucous celebration and ceremonial
toasts, the day we give thanks centers mainly around food
Though I do admit I did look forward to a good
wine with dinner , the main focus was usually on the next course.

Next up is Christmas, complete with work parties,
stressful shopping, decorating and for some,
dread of certain family members.
Many of us remember the constant availability of
spiked eggnog, aperitifs, and jazzy coffees,
along with the usual beer, wine and cocktails.

Having never been a fan of New Year's Eve;
which I always considered an amateur night,
it has been the easiest to handle in sobriety.

The best advice is to stay vigilant, talk about it,
and maybe hit a meeting.
accept that others can still drink safely.
It is comforting to know that we can be present
enjoy holiday festivities.

Monday quotes

Where is home? Home is where the heart can laugh without shyness. Home is where the heart's tears can dry at their own pace.
- Vernon Baker

Luck? I don't know anything about luck. I've never banked on it, and I'm not afraid of people who do. Luck to me is something else: hard work - and realizing what is opportunity and what isn't.
- Lucille Ball

Solitude is fine, but you need someone to tell you that solitude is fine.
- Honore De Balzac

A tree is known by its fruit; a man by his deeds. A good deed is never lost; he who sows courtesy reaps friendship, and he who plants kindness gathers love.
- Basil

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
- Melody Beattie

We all are born mad. Some remain so.
- Samuel Beckett

The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose.
- Hada Bejar

Listening to your heart is not simple. Finding out who you are is not simple. It takes a lot of hard work and courage to get to know who you are and what you want.
- Sue Bender

Each morning the day lies like a fresh shirt on our bed; this incomparably fine, incomparably tightly woven tissue of pure prediction fits us perfectly. The happiness of the next twenty-four hours depends on our ability, on waking, to pick it up.
- Walter Benjamin

You stand outside the circle and wonder why you feel left out, unaware that you need your own permission to join the others - not theirs.
- Rusty Berkus

Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.
- Elizabeth Bibesco

There is a calmness to a life lived in gratitude... a quiet joy.
- Ralph H. Blum

We are co-creators with God, not puppets on a string waiting for something to happen.
- Father Leo Booth

I avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep going forward.
- Charlotte Bronte

show up, own up, grow up

our simple, basic formula for recovery.

becoming and remaining available and
accountable.
accepting responsibilities, performing
service and doing the footwork required
to become a better family member, friend
and employee.

admitting past wrongs and striving to
correct present transgressions.
getting honest with self, acknowledging
personality flaws and trying to improve
them. continuing to be honest with
others, remaining patient and tolerant.

finally the most elusive facet of recovery;
maturity.

it's not always easy to let go of selfish,
immature and ego-driven behaviors.
stunted emotional growth is common
among alcoholics and addicts.

growing up has it's share of pains;
but it is essential to the path of
progressive wellnes.

thanks for asking!

I have been asked by Lucy,
"what is it about drinking that you most
enjoyed or that you found most tempting? "

growing up shy and insecure, drinking
provided relief from inhibitions and fear
of rejection.

since I had an extended "honeymoon"
period with boozing, it was a reward
and a welcome complement to socializing
with relatives and friends.

in addition, drinking was common after
playing sports. whether it was co-ed
softball, or my extended volleyball
career.

being able to say and do things that i
wouldn't without a buzz, was also
a huge part of the attraction.

looking back i realize that drinking
always preceded any amorous
events in my life, to relieve shyness
and inhibition with the opposite sex.

spiritual awakening

at last nights meeting I shared that
I feel like rip van winkle concerning
any spiritual awakening.

since getting serious about recovery
in 2001, the thought of a drink has
never left me.

while the urge has lessened, the constant
reminders seen and heard in daily life
continue to tempt me.

initially there was a nagging envy of
folks who could drink safely.
this began to wane and I started to
become more comfortable around
social drinkers.

gradually I would even enjoy observing
the various stages of inebriation.
still, the memories of the many years
of the "good old days" would crop up.

while I came to accept my condition,
continue to pray, ask for help,
attend daily meetings and remain
honest and willing, the thought remains.

today I fully accept the cards dealt to me.
what is paramount is my ability to
think it through, and remember there
is nothing that a drink will remove or
improve.

Monday quotes

"Happiness is not by chance, but by choice."
Jim Rohn


"Decision and determination are the engineer and fireman of our train to opportunity and success."Burt Lawlor


"Choice, not circumstances, determines your success."
Anonymous


You cannot solve a problem until you acknowledge that you have one and accept responsibility for solving it.
Zig Ziglar


Always give without remembering and always receive without forgetting.
Brian Tracy


"You leave old habits behind by starting out with the thought, 'I release the need for this in my life'." Dr. Wayne W. Dyer


"Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much."
Helen Keller


"You have to find happiness in yourself before you can find it with someone."
Anonymous


"There is nothing so strong as gentleness, and nothing so gentle as strength."
Leo Muir


"If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results."
Jack Dixon



"The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly."
Siddartha Guatama Buddha

women & alcoholism

from an article in psychology today titled
"women alcoholics; masters of deception"
by Deborah King.

"The inner voice of the alcoholic is a running monologue of excuses, a compendium of denial, a master of deception. I just have to get through this rough patch in my marriage. It's a tough time at work, with all these deadlines approaching. My kids are driving me crazy. Oh, I'll just have a little sip...wouldn't get a fly high."

it is explained in the post how women are

expected to perform a myriad of roles.

due to the various responsibilities many

women have to put on a good front, and

always seem in control.

this leads to hiding and minimizing bouts

of drinking. these behaviors tend to fuel

denial and prevent some women from

seeking help. i have witnessed the struggles

women face from my experience in our

sober house and empathize with the

unique difficulties of seeking an maintaining

sobriety.