Monday, March 30, 2009


it's my first monday at the new house in phoenix

things are very different out here

i lived my whole life in new england;
the small state of connecticut.

everything is just so huge out here

a big change

still, the sun's shining, almost 80 degrees
not a cloud in the sky...

life is good today

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Friday, March 27, 2009

friday questions

what's the best time of the day?

who understands recovery the
most and least in your life?

is there an age you would like to be again?

where do want to be in 5 years?

should i continue to ask friday questions?

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Thursday, March 26, 2009

thursday thought

Flatter me, and I may not believe you.
Criticize me, and I may not like you.
Ignore me, and I may not forgive you.
Encourage me, and I may not forget you.
- William Arthur Ward

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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

limerick for wednesday

The three elderly Gallagher sisters have never married, they go everywhere together and they are all hard of hearing. One windy Spring day as they are walking down the streets of Dublin…

Mary Elizabeth says, "Whew, it is sure windy today."

Molly replies, "No, no. Today is Thursday."

Kathleen says, "So am I. Let's find a bar!

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Monday, March 23, 2009

monday's musing

Instructions for Life Take into account that great love and great
achievements involve great risk.

When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

Follow the three "R"s:

Respect for self
Respect for others
Responsibility for all your actions.

Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a
wonderful stroke of luck.

Learn the rules so you know how to break them

Don't let a little dispute injure a great

When you realize you've made a mistake, take
immediate steps to correct it.

Spend some time alone every day.

Open your arms to change, but don't let go of
your values.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back,
you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.

A loving atmosphere in your home is the
foundation for your life.

In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation.
Don't bring up the past.

Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve

Be gentle with the earth.

Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.

Remember that the best relationship is one in
which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

~ Life's Little Instruction Book
H. Jackson Brown.

~ Life's Little Instruction Book
H. Jackson Brown.

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Saturday, March 21, 2009

better than "just say no"

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Friday, March 20, 2009

friday questions

how is your mood affected by the various seasons,
and what is your favorite?

do you think drugs should be legalized, taxed
and regulated?

are penalties for first time DUI offenders fair
or too harsh?

is your relationship with parents, children,
or significant other different in sobriety?

do you believe people can be more creative
while under the influence of alcohol or drugs?

is happiness more of a choice rather than
a result of recovery?

do you wish more people would seek recovery?

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Thursday, March 19, 2009

letting go

there have been some reactions since
my post to the late Bruce Drever.

I've been asked "what's the point",
"are you over it now", "can't you
let it go?"

one friend e-mailed me and asked
why i didn't confront Bruce when
he was alive.

my response was, I DID let it go;
it was never my intention or responsibility
to seek amends.
that is the duty of the party who does the harm.

my main concern was the reputation
of Prospect House; something Deb &
I started and worked to establish as
a professionally run sober house.

We are not absentee landlords,
rooming house renters or other
pretenders in the recovery field.
This is our mission and we are
dedicated to it.

There never was any valid reason
for Bruce to discourage mountainside clients
from continuing their recovery
at Prospect House, other than a personal
issue with me.

unethical, unprofessional , vindictive
and a disservice to the clients he was
paid to help.

I can let it go, but the facts remain the same.

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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

drinking holidays

another "amateur day" has come and gone.

like new year's eve, a time when people
feel compelled to drink.

for those who are habitual imbibers,
it's a chance to overindulge and appear normal.

I remember those times many years ago,
when i could show up at the pub at 10 AM,
on St Patrick's day and not feel odd or uncomfortable.

today it's amusing to watch all the typical
behavior patterns as the "amateurs" go through
the stages of intoxication...

they laugh, flirt, shout, debate, and even fight.

it's all too amusing to observe-
and remember that was once me.

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Monday, March 16, 2009


life is all about choices;

what should I do?

where should I be?

who am I today?

where do I want to be?

what's it really all about?

all these things come up and confound me

maybe it's my age and stage of my life.

things are so good, yet i feel unfulfilled.

what more do i need?

this journey of life never ceases to confuse me

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Sunday, March 15, 2009

thoughts of the day

one of life's little mysteries...
the thermos bottle---

you put hot stuff in, it stays hot;
you put cold stuff in, it stays cold...

how does it know?

a joy of life;
finding money no one lost.

The qualities that most attract a woman to a man
are usually the same ones she can't stand years later.

The other line always moves faster.

Two wrongs don't make a right. It usually takes three or four.

The road to success is always under construction

When things are going right, you won't notice

If it's stupid but it works, it ain't stupid

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Saturday, March 14, 2009

a little humor

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Friday, March 13, 2009

friday questions

what do you like and dislike about yourself?

is there a seniority mentality or a "pecking order"
in any groups you attend?

is there anyone who should make amends to you?

what is the best aspect of recovery?

is it difficult to discuss sobriety with family or friends?

do you believe you will have to attend meetings
the rest of your life?

are you different now, compared to when you stopped drinking?

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Tuesday, March 10, 2009

tuesday quotes

I believe, if we take habitual drunkards as a class, their heads and their hearts will bear an advantageous comparison with those of any other class. There seems ever to have been a proneness in the brilliant and warm-blooded to fall into this vice.
Abraham Lincoln

It is a painful thing to look at your own trouble and know that you yourself and no one else has made it.

The basic difference between being assertive and being aggressive is how our words and behavior affect the rights and well being of others.
Sharon Anthony Bower

The most intelligent among us are the standards of conduct so long as the integrity of their understanding remains secure. Challenge their foundations, however, and the tyrannical child within will storm out and call you an idiot.
Thomas Whigham

Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one is to blame.
Erica Jong

Examine what is said, not him who speaks.
Arabian Proverb

The heights charm us, but the steps do not; with the mountain in our view we love to walk the plains.
Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.

H. L. Mencken

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Sunday, March 8, 2009


once you were a friend,
companion and soothing elixir;

my perfect pal who never let me down

like a reward after work or play,
we became inseparable.

it seemed we could go on blissfully forever...

alas, slowly our relationship changed;
no longer were you content with our
social affair...

you wanted more-
to start my day,
take you to work,
be my dinner date,
and stay up late.

i was being robbed-
of my freedom, health and happiness.

the laughter we once shared
turned to anger-
contentment to frustration-
hope to fear.

why me,
why now?

parting was tough,
we were so close, for so long.
the memories still linger;
why can't it be like it was?

I must say goodbye

perhaps in the future,
our paths will converge;
but for now, it has to be
farewell my old friend.

you cheated, you lied,
you said it would be forever...

our time is over and it's for the best,
no need to place blame or protest.

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Friday, March 6, 2009

friday questions

what do you do to handle stress?

why do you think long term recovery rates
are so low?

who do you rely on for advice other
than a sponsor?

where do you feel the most and least
comfortable in recovery?

have you lost a friend or relative to addiction?

do you believe rehabs care more about
your money than your recovery?

what is your best advice to anyone
attempting to get clean and sober?

did you make today better than yesterday?

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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

quick quotes

“Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.”
Oscar Wilde

By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest

“Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game.”


Teachers open the door but you must walk through it yourself.
Chinese proverb

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
Mae West

A day without laughter is a day wasted.
Charlie Chaplin

The dream is a conversation between man and his God. -

Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend.
Albert Camus

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Tuesday, March 3, 2009

tuesday thought

at today's noon meeting there was
the stark contrast of the many folks
who have 20+ years of sobriety, and
a young man just out of detox.

there were some good shares from
some wise people; thankfully no
preaching or finger-pointing, but
genuine concern and simple advice
for a man starting a journey.

I have been to meetings in 5 states
and countless cities;
while the flavor may change from
area to area, the recipe remains the same.

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