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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

spiritual awakening


at last nights meeting I shared that
I feel like rip van winkle concerning
any spiritual awakening.

since getting serious about recovery
in 2001, the thought of a drink has
never left me.

while the urge has lessened, the constant
reminders seen and heard in daily life
continue to tempt me.

initially there was a nagging envy of
folks who could drink safely.
this began to wane and I started to
become more comfortable around
social drinkers.

gradually I would even enjoy observing
the various stages of inebriation.
still, the memories of the many years
of the "good old days" would crop up.

while I came to accept my condition,
continue to pray, ask for help,
attend daily meetings and remain
honest and willing, the thought remains.

today I fully accept the cards dealt to me.
what is paramount is my ability to
think it through, and remember there
is nothing that a drink will remove or
improve.




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4 comments:

clean and crazy said...

i sometimes still have urges to drink, because drinking is not a street drug in the sense that it is legal. it makes it harder to fight those urges, except the fact that i was a terrible drunk and i lost the urge to drink when i found cocaine. so i just acquaint myself with members in recovery and i don't tempt my addiction. great post

~ Tabitha ~ said...

Well said/blogged ;)

Thank you for sharing.

Lucy Lopez said...

Hi. I just discovered your blog through a Google blog alert. It's a wonderful thing, I think, to share your experience. I'm sure it must help others.

I hope you won't mind me asking, but I'd really like to understand - what is it about drinking that you most enjoyed or that you found most tempting?

Blessings, Lucy

Shadow said...

this read like the poem it is. with a valuable message, thank you.

 
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