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Friday, January 1, 2010

friday funnies



Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
45 lb.

What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes

What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.









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1 comments:

Ms Survivor said...

LOL - I liked those! Made me smile. Made me think as well of something a friend said to me on New Years Eve (my first sober one!), though I think he stole it from Billy Connolly - if women are such good multi-taskers, then why can't they have a headache and sex at the same time?

Happy New Year! Hope it brings sobriety & peace.

xo

 
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